a cold fearhedged my heart inharsh wordsof running awayi set my jawlosing you is here againlike so many timessomebody says they’ll leavebut this time i’ll notprotect my hearti’ll take it on the chin and me a mani’ll take it on the chinpain cries in many voicesnot l of them minewe’ll pick up the piecesbecause we love
Powered [...]
down again
down-down
its all supposed to be
verry verry jolly
the new year is at hand
great
but deep inside my heart
the fear pools coldly
if only i could stop
stop
If only I could
if only I
If only
If
meaning comes and goes
there’s never enough of it
its like lunch
you seem to need it once day
I mean how much can one person eat?
what do we do over [...]
oh my goodness
I hate it when this happens
Just when I thought I had the answer
the question strikes back
and morphs again to be
something different again
WHAT’S THE EFFING QUESTION?
So needy I seem to be
so much I hate that state
I beg for crumbs
from those to which
I least want to appear needy.
I can’t help it
This poem is going wrong
maybe its not [...]
Giraffe # 1
Its weird
to find
that I
have lost
so much
that was
myself
its strange
but I
have set
out to
discover
who
I am
so here’s
to me
the way
I am
I revel
in
the sum
who am
I then
that I
should argue
with
the Lord’s
own Son?
The puzzle
How gracious He is
How infinitely kind!
Pity we beat ourselves up
with the clubs placed in our hands
By our parents and loved ones
Thinking it is His wish.
When I saw His compassion
for me as I am
I am able to love myself just a bit.
If only I could remember that feeling forever
How different just living
would be…
It is an unveiling
a [...]
It’s all over now
Back again, but different
Now I am stripped
of my pseudo-me
hauled out of the service
to others.
Asked to step down
I expected an agony
instead I felt joy
being out from that burden
Which burden was that?
You may ask
The one that the Lord put there?
The answer is “no”
It’s the one that I took on me
To earn the life-right
to earn the right to [...]
my/your appleheart
My heart
Like and apple
Eaten by fear
Mouthful by mouthful
Consumed by terror
Fear relishes my life
The juice of me
And I shrink
The essence of me
Fuel to the fear
Oh God
Keep me safe
Hold me safe
Protect my heart
Safe from shrinking into
Nothingness
Disappeared I am
Out of focus
Trembling on the brink
Of the void
I need you so
Your love
My apple
Shining before me
Gleaming with good
Gleaming with God
I [...]
warming me
My morning Father,
My morning Lord
My all-time creator
Tenderly I touch
Tremulously I try
To find your presence.
You are near
I know
You are here
And I must just tune my taste
To find that you are good
Again
Still
And always were and will be
Here is no part of you
That is not good
No corner
Crouching
All of you
Is my food
Is my nourishment
You feed my heart
On your ever-green [...]
sunrise
The Presence of God
As I sit here, the beating of my heart,
the ebb and flow of my breathing, the movements of my mind
are all signs of God’s ongoing creation of me.
I pause for a moment, and become aware
of this presence of God within me.
WELCOME Lord
I open the sluices a little.
I see the rosy touch [...]
morning prayer
I
You presence within
I reach out/in
And awareness bleeds
Slowly at first
Into my mind
Me heart is next
Sniffing the wind
Where is my God
Where is he now?
Follow the trail
Of joy
Abba? Abba?
I’ve lost your scent
Where are you,
God my Father?
I wait
You have not yet
Left me unattended
Never once that I have called
Have I remained alone
Then I look down
I feel the rhythm
I see you [...]
